“Don’t worry, Scott. I’m not going to orbit for a billion years like the article says. My friend from Algeiba will pick me up tomorrow once we’ve cleared Earth’s atmosphere. The car will though. It wasn’t really mine. I just borrowed it to make the launch more dramatic. And dramatic it was! Watch this!”

SpaceX Falcon Heavy rocket launches successfully.

SpaceX's Falcon Heavy rocket has launched successfully, making history as the world's most powerful rocket.